21 - Imagine yourself at your own funeral.
- If you could change anything right now about your life, what would it be?
- This passage is something I think about quite often. The fact that one day, not to be morbid, but, one day we will all be gone. It is inevitable. However I think it's a good reminder to be patient with yourself, and be kind to others because you never know if you will get the chance to again. Also you never know how your actions will impact others. If I could change one thing, I would definitely be more kind and patient with myself. Sometimes it's hard to not feel overwhelmed between school, work and family, I need to learn balance.
22 - Repeat to yourself “Life is not an Emergency"
- Describe a time or moment in your life when you turned something into an emergency.
- This passage reminds me of what my mother would call “manufactured drama” Meaning simply that we are the ones that create most of our own issues. One time in my life that I made a mountain out of a molehill was when I was going to camp, and would be away from my parents for a week. In this situation it was more scary than usual because there was no service, which I know sounds like I'm addicted to my phone, however that is not the case. It was because I could not reach anyone if an emergency came up, which is super worst case scenario, but that's how my brain works. In the end everything worked out and it was one of the best summer vacations of my life.
23 - Using the back burner
- Analyze : “It puts our quieter, softer, and sometimes most intelligent source of thinking to work for us on issues that we have no immediate answer for.”
- To me, this means that by putting things on the back burner, like when people say to “sleep on it,” because it tends to give us more perspective when we think about things a little less. Honestly it's so true, most of the time by giving some time for you to calm down and take another look at the issue you are able to solve most any issue. Most of the time when things spiral out of control, and life feels crazy you just need a bit more perspective. I promise it's not the end of the world. I am a very logical person so this isn't really that much of an issue for me, (realizing how logically everything will be fine) however I sometimes struggle balancing the emotions that come with.
24 - Spend a Moment of Every Day Thinking of Someone to Thank
- Who are you grateful for, and why? How will you convey this gratitude?
- I am immensely grateful for my grandpa. He is my mothers dad. I have only gotten closer to him in recent years. Before this I was very close with my grandma, but sadly she passed in 2016. Ever since grandpa and I became best friends. I am constantly trying to help him with anything I can, whether that be planting tomatoes or corn, to driving up the mountain to help him cut wood for the winter. I am also constantly reminding him that I love him, even if he doesn't always say it back, his actions speak louder than his unspoken words.
25 - Smile at Strangers, Look into Their Eyes, and Say Hello
- When you are reading this chapter, regarding eye contact and connect, what are your initial thoughts?
- I am constantly watching others when in public. I am a people watcher, not in a creepy way though, I just find people interesting. When watching the way others react to certain things, or even better what they do when they think no one is watching, you can tell alot about a person. Sometimes people are kind at heart, and others aren’t, and sometimes we can connect with them. Maybe that's through a smile while you hold the door open for them, or a simple hello when you pass them on the street. Simple acts of kindness are something we need more of.
26 - Set Aside Quiet Time, Every Day
- When do you find a moment of quiet in your day, everyday, where you are just quiet and present? Do you? Maybe you don’t… Explain.
- I try to, however lately it has been a bit difficult. I have school, basketball, work, and family time. Over the past year I have fallen in love with reading, magical worlds, sarcastic and bold characters, a distraction really. I love to be able to shut off my “real world brain” and create scenarios in my head of the plot line and characters. Lately I have been so busy I have not been able to sit and read, and, crazy enough, I am feeling it. I just need to remember to take things one at a time, and to make time for myself. I will be just fine.
27 - Imagine the People in Your Life as Tiny Infants and as One-Hundred-Year-Old Adults
- Describe a time when you have been frustrated with someone, but you “let go” of the situation and moved forward with your life. How did that make you feel?
- I am constantly frustrated with my sister, however because she is my sister, I always forgive her. I love her so much, and sometimes she makes some questionable decisions, but she is young, and it's not worth what it does to me and my mentality to hold onto the negativity. When I hold onto emotions based on others, and their actions and words, I tend to feel more tired and anxious. So to alleviate my anxieties I let it “pass” and feel much better in the end.
28 - Seek First to Understand
- Describe a situation where you didn’t seek to understand first. Was there a resolution to this conflict?
- Currently I have been going through some things with a life-long friend of mine. We have been friends for 14 years, meaning I have grown up with her, however we have not grown up the same. Because of our different upbringings we matured at different times, me sooner than her. And while she is sweet, she has very immature tendencies, which can sometimes be hard to deal with. As of late I have made new friends and have been hanging out with different people, and she has sort of stopped talking to me. At first I was confused, then I looked deeper, I think she feels left behind (which makes me sad). However I have to remember that it's not my responsibility to drag her along and make her be social, or talk to others, or go to events and get out of the house. She needs to learn to be independent, and secure with herself. My mom says I am too hard on people, but that's my thoughts for now.
29 - Become a Better Listener
- Who is someone that you can genuinely talk to, that you know will listen to you. Describe that relationship.
- Honestly…myself. I tell my mom some stuff, I don't really tell my dad stuff (I love him so much but he doesn't understand), I tell my sister a little, I tell some friends a little, and out of everyone I probably tell my grandpa the most. I have been super busy lately, and haven’t been able to sit and talk with grandpa for a while. And I miss him so much, it was such a positive outlet and he always had the best advice. All in all when it comes down to it, the only person that knows everything is myself. The only person I can inevitably rely on is myself. Don't get me wrong, you need to talk some things out and have outlets for your emotion…you can’t keep it all bottled up and/or avoid it (believe me I tried). However I am the only one I know will be with me 100% of the time for the rest of my life, so I might as well learn now to be content with myself and how to work out my own problems.
30 - Choose Your Battles Wisely
- Describe a time when you lost your shit and in reality it wasn't worth the energy. How did you feel after the confrontation? Could you have gone differently if you didn't sweat the small stuff?
- Honestly happens at least once every two weeks. I get so in my head and can't differentiate facts from feelings and completely panic. I am working on separating my irrational thoughts and feelings from what is actually happening. It is so draining and exhausting, afterwards I just want to sleep for years to recover. But I can't, so I have to keep moving forward one step at a time. Though it is difficult, I am working towards having a more positive mindset overall.
31 - Become Aware of Your Moods and Don’t Allow Yourself to Be Fooled by the Low Ones
- Explain a time when you were in a bad mood and how it shaped your day. Vise Versa, explain a time when you were in a great mood and discuss the day you had.
- Being in a bad mood, whether that's because I am anxious, or frustrated, always tends to make the day longer and more painful. For me, being anxious makes everything harder, interacting with people and being social, along with sitting by myself in the quiet with my own thoughts. However when I am in a good mood, energetic and happy, the day flies by with ease. I am fully aware of how my mindset impacts my mood, and by default, my overall day. So I am trying to be more conscious of keeping a positive mindset and having energy, even if I am faking it till I make it.
32 - Life is a Test. It is Only a Test
- “As an experiment, see if you can apply this idea to something you are forced to deal with” right now. Explain your emotions and logic behind this situation. Can you rise above it?
- Honestly when people say life is a test, it is so true. It tests how much you can handle and how you react to what is thrown your way. Are you bitter? Do you continue to live with peace in your soul and happiness on your face? As James said in class, “if you can see life as a test, you can see life as an opportunity.” SO TRUE. And perception and perspective are EVERYTHING. If I am in a pissy mood, and frustrated with myself, I take a step back and take a look at the bigger picture. Oftentimes it's not that deep, you can ultimately rise above anything with the right self-discipline and dedication. But you have to make that decision for yourself. To pick your head up and keep moving forward, because even if you are moving so slow, you haven't stopped and are still moving forward.
- Honestly when people say life is a test, it is so true. It tests how much you can handle and how you react to what is thrown your way. Are you bitter? Do you continue to live with peace in your soul and happiness on your face? As James said in class, “if you can see life as a test, you can see life as an opportunity.” SO TRUE. And perception and perspective are EVERYTHING. If I am in a pissy mood, and frustrated with myself, I take a step back and take a look at the bigger picture. Oftentimes it's not that deep, you can ultimately rise above anything with the right self-discipline and dedication. But you have to make that decision for yourself. To pick your head up and keep moving forward, because even if you are moving so slow, you haven't stopped and are still moving forward.
33 - Praise & Blame Are All the Same
- You will not please everyone…how does this statement sit with you and why do we tend to focus on the negative rather than the positive?
- You will not please everyone…yup. I can’t even describe how much this statement frustrates me. Because yes it's true, but the word is also such a social place that if people don't like you then you wont go far. As my mom says “it's all about who you know, not about what you know” In the end peoples opinions of you matter. Some let it determine their worth, others self-determine their own worth. THAT is what's important. You can not make everyone happy in the end, and trying to constantly isn't healthy. I know this, and that's why I try not to care what others think and to stay true to my own personal values. However I do believe that there is a time and place to bring up certain things, for example school and politics should remain separate, etc.
- You will not please everyone…yup. I can’t even describe how much this statement frustrates me. Because yes it's true, but the word is also such a social place that if people don't like you then you wont go far. As my mom says “it's all about who you know, not about what you know” In the end peoples opinions of you matter. Some let it determine their worth, others self-determine their own worth. THAT is what's important. You can not make everyone happy in the end, and trying to constantly isn't healthy. I know this, and that's why I try not to care what others think and to stay true to my own personal values. However I do believe that there is a time and place to bring up certain things, for example school and politics should remain separate, etc.
34 - Praise Random Acts of Kindness
- Describe a time when you completed RAK and how did it make you feel?
- One of my favorite things to do when I'm in a good mood is compliment others. It is quite impulsive behavior, because I say whatever comes to mind to compliment someone random. My favorite part is to watch peoples faces light up when they hear me. I feel like (at least for me) when I get super in my own head I shut down and can't really think of anything other than the issues I'm focused on at that moment. So when I talk to people, specifically complimenting them, I hope to shed some light on the fact that things aren't that deep and you can make it through anything. Also the domino effect is something to keep in mind, because oftentimes people pay forward acts done unto them, both positive and negative.
- One of my favorite things to do when I'm in a good mood is compliment others. It is quite impulsive behavior, because I say whatever comes to mind to compliment someone random. My favorite part is to watch peoples faces light up when they hear me. I feel like (at least for me) when I get super in my own head I shut down and can't really think of anything other than the issues I'm focused on at that moment. So when I talk to people, specifically complimenting them, I hope to shed some light on the fact that things aren't that deep and you can make it through anything. Also the domino effect is something to keep in mind, because oftentimes people pay forward acts done unto them, both positive and negative.
35 - Look Beyond Behavior |
In your own words, describe the meaning of Loving - Kindness.
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36 - See the Innocence |
What occurs when we practice compassion towards others and let go of “their” story, rather than be caught up in the drama of a situation?
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37 - Choose Being Kind Over Being Right |
Define equanimity. Do you practice this in your life? Look to your ego first before you answer…
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38 - Tell Three People (Today) How Much You Love Them |
In picking 3 people, who would you choose and why?
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39 - Practice Humility. |
Describe a time when you saw an individual or group lack humility. How did that make you feel about said individual/group?
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40 - When in Doubt about Whose Turn It Is to Take Out the Trash, Go Ahead and Take it Out. |
What is your perspective/opinion of this article? Valid, or a waste of time?
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41 - Avoid Weatherproofing. |
Do you ‘weatherproof?’ Explain.
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42 - Spend a Moment, Every Day, Thinking of Someone to Love |
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43 - Become an Anthropologist
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44 - Understand Separate Realities |
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45 - Develop Your Own Healing Rituals |
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46 - Every Day, Tell at Least One Person Something You Like, Admire, or Appreciate About Them. |
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47 - Argue for Your Limitations, and They’re Yours. |
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